So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize