Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
