you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
