Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
