My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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