I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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