Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
