i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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