I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
