You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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