I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
