you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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