Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize