Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
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I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
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I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
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