i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm like, not good at living.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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