Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
