Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
