dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
