if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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