i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize