That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
