He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I supernannyed him into submission
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