It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
im holly from the hills drunk
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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