I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
ugly people sure do ruin things
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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