Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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