Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We just shotgunned beers for America
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
