If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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