Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize