i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
