11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I didn't shave. On purpose
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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