Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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