Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
