That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
