The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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