Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
