break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
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