so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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