sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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