i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies