I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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