there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
