Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
