I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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