let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
