my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
