you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Blood and glitter go together right?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
