I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
