but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize