I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
