we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
