He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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